Last month I received some news that was quite painful. But in the week that followed, my thoughts around what had occurred were downright tortuous. Until, in a Nia dance class, I heard my Wise Self say loud and clear, “Renee, don’t create more pain for yourself than is necessary.”  This stopped me in my tracks. It helped me to realize my role in what was happening.

I was lying in bed Sunday morning reading from author Anne Lamott's beautiful little book Small Victories. In one of her stories about parenting, she shares with a little self-deprecation, but mostly tenderness, how she doesn't bake for…