“If you want reality to be different than what it is, you might as well try to teach a cat to bark.” Author/teacher Byron Katie
We had a really bumpy holiday. There was some extended-family discord around our Christmas celebration, a series of unexpected, stressful events in December, a foregone mini-vacation due to a case of the flu and way too much time recuperating at home. Together. (My son and I are big extroverts–cabin fever is our worst enemy!)
Recently I’ve noticed a pattern I’ve fallen into of feeling increasingly frustrated when things aren’t as they should be: my son is goofing off online instead of working on school work, my partner still hasn’t called the handyman, a vendor over-charged me, the vegetable soup I made was too salty. I know things won’t always go my way but lately, I’ve been a bit of a bulldog.
Knowing the science behind a gratitude practice, I paused yesterday to write out what I was grateful for. I filled a large 11×7 sheet and felt I could have kept going. When I finished, I wrote at the top of the page, “Everything is perfect,” and then heard my Wise Self whisper, “Remember…..?”
I have always believed that there is a thread of divine order that runs through everything … that what we experience is not random or coincidental but here to help us become more aware, more awake and evolve. When we look at big messy, painful life stuff–death of a loved one, health crises, financial loss or divorce–the idea that everything is perfect, sounds insane. But looking at how axial the many losses in my immediate family were to my path and my current work –I know in my bones this is true for me. Even if it feels impossible or crazy to justify how or why this is so.
Author Marianne Williamson says, “The purpose of our lives is to give birth to the best that is within us.” For the 12 years I was a career coach, I worked with thousands of clients, many of whom experienced or were recovering from devastating loss. Yet, everything always worked out. And interestingly the more they trusted and let things unfold –the faster everything seemed to fall into order.
When I allow instead of fight what I’m experiencing—when I release and let go–I can see a strange perfection, even in the midst of chaos and extreme disorder. I can look at my messy house, my complex relationships, my less than perfect financial plan and observe the underlying truth that everything is perfect. Really. I am in the right place, at the right time, right now.
A CHALLENGE: For one entire day, play with the idea that everything in your life is in divine order. Every time something appears to “not go your way,” invite in the words: everything is perfect, and see if it creates a shift or change in perception. Be curious, be open, be willing to be surprised. We all need to take off our glasses every now and then, give them a good cleaning and challenge our current world view. I’d love to hear what you learn.
JOIN OUR TRIBE! Ready to move into a more trusting place and learn to go with the flow of life-instead of moving against it? Consider joining our international community of women supporting women and tap into the power of a tribe by becoming a RTA-Certified Facilitator. The program includes an individual coaching session with me and we’re offering $100 off training through 1/31 plus private coaching/support from me. Learn more.
P.S. Step into a New Way of Being in 2018. If you’ve been considering joining me at beautiful Kripalu Center for Yoga & Health, the largest retreat center in North America, Jan. 26-28 or at 1440 Multiversity April 20-22 in the redwoods of CA, don’t delay, only a handful of rooms left! Learn more.
Subscribe here to Live Inside Out, a weekly blog written by transformational coach/speaker and Career Strategists president, Renée Peterson Trudeau. Offering custom life balance workshops, women’s retreats, training/certification, books/telecourses and personalized career coaching, her work has appeared in The New York Times, Good Housekeeping, Spirituality & Health and more. Thousands of women in ten countries are becoming RTA-Certified Facilitators and leading/joining self-care groups based on her award-winning curriculum. She is the author of The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal and Nurturing the Soul of Your Family: 10 Ways to Reconnect and Find Peace in Everyday Life. She lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and 15 year-old son. More on her background here.