The dying never share they wished they had worked more, but they often regret not spending more time with family and friends. Are you living the life you desire-or someone else’s entirely?
Does every cell in your body want to yell, “Stop the merry-go-round–I WANT OFF!” ?
I’ve been thinking about how speeded up we have all become: plowing through inhumane to-do lists, agreeing to crazy sports practice schedules and insane homework loads, staying up late glued to our online devices and then slogging through the week sleep deprived, commuting for hours in traffic to jobs we don’t love or events we don’t want to attend and just generally trying to do too much (read about why this is one of the key causes of stress).
As I look at my own life and type-A tendency to always underestimate how much energy and time things take, I’m wondering, “What needs to happen to wake us all up from this hyper-busy madness?!”
Yesterday morning while in a downward dog at yoga, I realized the best place to start is at home, with my own family. So, Sunday night we circled up over homemade vegetable soup and cornbread (we love to linger over slow meals on Sunday evenings) and talked about what we each most need to hear to allow us to slow down during this busy season. And the Permission Granted Manifesto was born. I thought I’d share it in case it inspires you to want to write your own Permission Granted manifesto.
The Trudeau Family’s Permission Granted Manifesto ~ Fall 2015. We promise to give ourselves and each other permission:
To practice good is good enough so we can focus on what matters most (example: having steel-cut oatmeal with fruit/nuts for dinner one night or giving a school friend a b-day present a week late during a busy time so we can enjoy more time together as a family).
To change our minds and say “no,” as needed (example: canceling a weekend or day trip, changing our rsvp to a “no,” for a party because we’ve been going non-stop and need to rest).
To take a mental health day as dictated by our bodies (example: after a lot of travel, a super intense period at work or a week of exams, you feel your health is less than robust—call in sick and stay home and replenish, don’t wait to get the flu to slow down).
To do less so we can put our relationships first (example: there’s a huge school festival happening all day Saturday and we’re exhausted from the week; we decide to sleep in and only go for 1 hour instead of 6).
To skip outings and stay home (example: we’ve had evening events twice in one week and know that the Friday night school concert will put us over the edge—so we skip it, stay home for movie night and let our friends fill us in!).
To make downtime and naps/resting a priority on the weekends (example: my 8th grader has had a really challenging week at school and we’re supposed to be gone all day Sunday to see my family in San Antonio; he asks if instead we can stay home and read/rest all day. We say, “Yes!” so when Monday morning rolls around, we’re replenished instead of depleted). Read more here on the power of REST.
One of my personal intentions or mantras for this fall—which is filled with a lot of speaking and new opportunities– is simplicity. For me, this is about creating inner simplicity: a less busy mind, more internal space, a slower pace and a more focused purpose. So, granting myself permission to really do things differently and get the rest I need, when I need it, feels incredibly good.
Interested in learning more strategies to help you stress-less this fall? Check out these seven.
I’D LOVE TO SUPPORT YOU: Ready to “do it different” and explore a new way of being? Check out my highly popular life balance telecourses (download 24/7 at your convenience) or join or lead a Personal Renewal Group (PRG) for moms–learn more. One of the most popular themes in our PRGs–which are meeting in more than 10 countries around the globe–is Managing Your Energy and Learning to Say “No.” Amen!
Subscribe here to Live Inside Out, a weekly blog written by life balance teacher/author and Career Strategists president, Renée Peterson Trudeau. Offering speaking, custom workshops, training, books/telecourses and individual coaching focusing on self-renewal for women, her work has appeared in The New York Times, Good Housekeeping, Spirituality & Health and more. Thousands of women in ten countries are becoming RTA-Certified Facilitators and leading/joining self-care groups based on her award-winning curriculum. She is the author of The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal and Nurturing the Soul of Your Family: 10 Ways to Reconnect and Find Peace in Everyday Life. She lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and 13 year-old son. More on her background here.