Is Your Pace Sustainable (+ 9 ways to say no)?
Once when I was at Kripalu Center for Yoga & Health leading a women’s retreat, I met an executive who was the dean of a large medical school. She said they had just added a class on work-life balance and resiliency to their medical school curriculum. But, she wonders if her young doctors in training will see the value of this course for their patients—and themselves—as they navigate their intense pace.
Sustainability is often defined as the capacity to endure, the long-term maintenance of responsibility and, I would add, the long-term maintenance of self.
Most of us are living at a pace that is unsustainable—what I would call an inhumane pace. We throw our energy around like handfuls of rice grains at newlyweds. We’re overextended, over-scheduled, racing through our to-do lists and we rarely pause before we say “Yes,” to requests. (Read my 9 Ways to Say No here.)
Our energy is precious. It’s the currency that allows us to do things in the world. And it’s finite. But we rarely honor it or see it as sacred (which it is!).
As you consider your next request, project or invitation ask yourself:
- Will this activity or relationship feed me or drain me?
- Is my intuition saying “Yes” to this request, or “No”? (Pay attention to the sensation in your gut—the body never lies.)
- Does being around this person, group or organization make me feel positive, negative or neutral?
- In this situation, what is uniquely mine to do? And know that very often, the answer is, “Nothing.”
During my twenties and thirties—perhaps like the medical students—I ran myself hard. I would push and push and then live for the weekends where I’d crawl to a yoga class, live for happy hour with friends or take in a massage– finally allowing myself to slow down and add a few cups of water to my dry-as-a-bone well.
But the chronic stress began to take a toll and in my late thirties, I became clear that I didn’t want to just “survive”– I wanted to thrive. I wanted to find a sustainable way of living that supported me in maintaining an unwavering allegiance to myself, making choices that left me feeling alive, whole and resilient, and generating and building energy reserves for yet-to-be-manifested dreams and desires.
While leading a support call for leaders on Harnessing & Leveraging Your Energy recently, I shared that even when I’m working on something big that is energy intensive—like launching a book or changing a learned behavior—I want to land on the other side of the experience feeling replenished and nourished. I want to feel like I have not abandoned myself and I have paused frequently to remind myself that, “Just because I can, doesn’t mean I should.”
SEEKING NEW WAYS OF BEING FOR YOURSELF OR YOUR TEAM? HERE ARE FOUR OPPORTUNITIES:
- April 26 – 28th ~ Awakening Your Wild Soul: A Women’s Self-Renewal Retreat at Kripalu Center for Yoga & Health (Berkshire Mountains, Western MA). Join me for a complete re-set: replenishing rest, divine natural foods cuisine, song/movement, restorative yoga and more. I’d love to mentor you in learning to revere your energy and direct it to what matters most. Packages start at just $635 for this deeply supportive, replenishing weekend. Learn more/register.
- *NEW OFFERING!* Secrets to Facilitating Life-Changing Women’s Groups/Retreats in Uncertain Times ~ the course. Are you passionate about empowering other women in your area? It’s a whole new world and now more than ever we need each other–in person. Created by Renee, this beautiful mentoring/training “jump start” package–based on our now retired wildly popular 18-year-old Facilitator Training Program–offers everything you need to masterfully facilitate women’s circles/retreats. Download today. Only $195 for a limited time. Learn more.
- April 5th & April 18th ~ “Refill Your Well: Tools & Practices to Build Resiliency.” Feeling burned out, live in Western NC and work in education/healthcare/nonprofit management? Through the generous support of NC foundations, The Center for Trauma Resilient Communities will offer several half-day self-renewal retreats for leaders in healthcare, education and nonprofit management. I’m excited to facilitate these grant-funded events for men/women around creating sustainability for self. Register here to attend or hire me to speak to your organization.
- Wild Souls Nature Adventures (based in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Western NC): authentic movement classes, community song circles, full moon hikes, meditation workshops, women’s circles & more. New offerings listed each week; have me design a custom experience for your team/friends. Join us Sunday, April 7th for our next Wild Souls Authentic Movement near Asheville, NC. Learn more.
Subscribe here to Live Inside Out, a weekly blog written by mindfulness coach/author/speaker and self-care evangelist Renée Peterson Trudeau. Passionate about helping men and women find balance through the art/science of self-care, Renee has been facilitating high-impact, interactive workshops for Fortune 500 companies, national nonprofits/conferences and organizations/teams worldwide for 25 years. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, Fast Company, Good Housekeeping, Yoga Journal, AARP Magazine, Spirituality & Health and more. She and her team have certified more than 450 facilitators in 10 countries around the globe to lead self-renewal groups/retreats based on her pioneering self-care curriculum. She’s the author of two books on life balance including the award-winning The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal: How to Reclaim, Rejuvenate and Re-Balance Your Life. She and her husband live in Western North Carolina; her latest venture is Wild Souls Nature Adventures. More on Renee here.